Didn't sleep too well last night. There are a cazillion things on the mind right now and it's hard for me to get my brain to shut off. Even the sedatives I have (that are supposed to help with this kinda thing) were no good. Will take two of them tonight (don't worry, I can take as many as 6 if I had too) and that should do the trick. Took my pre-employment drug test and physical today. Lemme tell you how fun those urine tests are for me. I could drink 3 gallons of water and have someone punching my bladder and I still won't be able to pee in that damn cup. It's a completely psychological thing. When I hear people outside the door and feel the cup scrape my leg it is a real turn-off. I've never done this well. I remember for the doctor once a long time ago, I had to bring the cup home, pee in it and then bring it back to him in a paper bag, glad a hobo didn't come across it. It's completely different when it's for doctor tests, than for a job; can't take that cup home. Everytime I've done this they had to give me at least 2 tries. It's a whole beat the clock thing, you get four minutes and then you have to leave. Well, needless to say, it took 3 tries this time. I felt like my stomach was going to explode, it was friggin' painful. I drank probably around 50oz. of water or so, and then more after the 2nd try. Finally made myself pee. Not fun. Guys have it kinda easy in that department since they have a built in hose and all. Still wouldn't want that weird crap hanging off of me. Can't even imagine what that is like. Ick.

Saw my therapist at school for the last time today. Gave me some names of people they refer to. The psychiatrist I saw at school was very good. He has a private practice and also does therapy, so I might go see him once I get my new insurance. Really kinda need only maintanance visits, once every 3 weeks or so. Not as crazy as I used to be. Alright, tired as monkeys. Peace out.